Friday, October 7, 2011
Nightshift vs Dayshift
Fun fact: I'm a nightshifter. At a psychiatric hospital.
As in I work nightshifts...not some mythological shape-shifter super hero...although that sounds way more awesome...
But there’s a number of reasons why working nights is better for me: I get paid more, and by nature staying up all night just comes much more naturally than staying up all day. Plus there's a definite personality shift from day staff to night staff, and I fall into the latter.
So here we go:
5 Reasons Why Night Staff is Better than Day Staff:
1.) Night staff gets my sense of humor.
Nurse on lunch break holding an apple: "Oh darn, I forgot to wash my apple this morning."
Me on lunch break holding an apple: "Oh yeah...me too."
I take a bite.
Nurse: "Wait, aren't you worried about eating a dirty apple?"
Me: "Nah, I'm more worried about the meth I did this morning."
Nurse #1: "Oh look, we're getting a patient named Heaven."
Nurse #2: "That's such an interesting name, I haven't heard that before."
Me: "That's totally my stripper name."
For the record, I do not do meth and I'm also not a stripper. Night staff laughs at that stuff. Point: nights.
2.) Night staff are as close to vampires as you'll get.
Night staff has no one to impress. We also shriek in the morning when people turn on the lights, and we walk to our cars in awe of this strange thing called "sunlight". Point: nights.
3.) We make better coffee.
Please, point: nights.
4.) Night staff are better at their jobs.
Yes, this is a stretch, but I'm going to say it. See, at a psych hospital, we are a part of the "real" hospital, so therefore we have to follow all staffing orders that are hospital wide. To save money, the hospital staffs short on nights. For the rest of the hospital it makes sense. People are sleeping at night. But in psych....oh honey...
People don't sleep in psych. They are always awake. When you tell someone it's bedtime, there's a good chance they will tell you that they are an orange and you are a carrot and as such they have superiority over you. There's really no way to argue with that.
Therefore, nightshift has to do the same jobs dayshift does, except with considerably less people. Point: nights.
There's a million people to fill in for days. But nights? Hardly anyone. If we're short there's a list of about 6 people we can call, and we all know it. Dayshift has the luxury of not coming in for any extra shifts because most likely someone else will cover it. Nights? Not so much. You get called you come to work. There's no one else to call.
There. I've vented and now I feel better. Also I'm going to bed now.